Spoiler warning! Watch where you tread, there are some spoilers ahead – turn back now if you’re not familiar with the first film…

• The opening notes of the John Williams score can only mean one thing… it’s Harry Potter time.

• Dumbledore is giving fashionista – who doesn’t love a chunky belt?

• McGonagall’s hat is epic too.

• We agree Minerva – the Dursleys are the worst.

• Shouldn’t laugh at Dudley pushing Harry into the cupboard but… we’re weak.

• ‘36? BUT LAST YEAR, LAST YEAR, I HAD 37!’ Lol.

• Harry is surprisingly calm about being able to talk to a snake.

• Flawless screaming by Fiona Shaw.

• WHY DIDN’T HARRY OPEN HIS LETTER STRAIGHTAWAY????

• Uncle Vernon’s descent into madness is quite something.

• If Harry didn’t try to grab the letters out of the air and took one from the floor, he would have had time to open it.

• Dudley: ‘Daddy’s gone mad’… yes he has.

• Hagrid’s here!

• ‘Dry up Dursley you great prune’ = top tier insult.

• Once again, Harry is taking a half-giant bursting into the hut, giving him a cake and using a pink umbrella to make a fire extremely well.

• He’s going to say the line…

• ‘Yer a wizard, Harry’ – HE SAID IT!

• The moment Harry’s life changed forever.

• The venom when Petunia calls her sister a freak – no love lost there.

• Karma is Dudley ending up with a pig’s tail.

• If everyone stopped talking when we walked into a room, we’d want the ground to swallow us up.

• Note how Quirrell didn’t shake Harry’s hand… excellent Easter egg for later on.

• We wish our high street looked like Diagon Alley – it doesn’t even have a Greggs.

• The grandeur of Gringotts is somewhat intimidating.

• Harry is rich, rich.

• The contents of vault 713 are not quite as impressive at first glance.

• Harry’s going to get his wand!

• Brilliant use of a sliding ladder there – excellent entrance from Ollivander.

• Have you ever thought about how we never actually see Harry cast a spell in this first film? Yes, he holds a wand, but he never actually says an incantation… now that’s curious.

• ‘The wand chooses the wizard, Mr Potter’ – classic.

• Bit of a downer to learn that your wand has an identical core to your parents’ murderer though.

• Hedwig! She’s looking as glorious as ever.

• First mention of Voldemort’s name!

• So, if Hagrid came for Harry on his birthday (31st July) and school starts 1st September – what happened to August?

• Hagrid vanishing is very mysterious and everything – but also extremely inconvenient.

• The Weasleys!

• Julie Walters might have only had one scene in this film, but she absolutely nailed it.

• ‘Walk straight at the wall’ – that sounds painful to be honest.

• The Hogwarts Express is looking majestic!

• ‘I’m Harry, Harry Potter’ reminds of the way another British icon introduces themselves.

• Ron’s face here is priceless.

• ‘We’ll take the lot!’ What about the other kids on the train? Do they not want snacks? We hope the trolley replenishes itself.

• ‘Has anyone seen a toad?’ What a first line from Hermione.

• ‘And you are?’ The disdain from Hermione. She’d be horrified to know that the boy with dirt on his nose is actually her future husband.

• The first time we see Hogwarts always makes us emotional.

• Trevor the toad has been located! What a relief.

• ‘I’m Malfoy, Draco Malfoy’ – they all love the dramatic introduction.

• ‘Red hair and a hand-me-down robe? You must be a Weasley’. Tom Felton bringing the sass as Malfoy.

• ‘I think I can tell the wrong sort for myself, thanks’ – Harry’s clapback was epic too.

• You start a new school and are immediately warned to keep out a corridor unless you want to suffer a painful death… that’s not terrifying at all.

• Excellent shot of Snape there – you would hardly notice Quirrell next to him.

• There seems to be no order at all to how the names are called out.

• Anyway, Harry really doesn’t want to be a Slytherin.

• Phew! Crisis averted – welcome to Gryffindor!

• Ron with a chicken drumstick in each hand – now that’s the energy you bring to a feast.

• Moving staircases? We feel sorry for anyone with a less-than-perfect sense of direction.

• The Gryffindor common room is so cosy.

• Harry’s little smile sitting at the window with Hedwig – for the first time he has a proper home.

• McGonagall makes an excellent cat.

• The instant regret Ron must feel after referring to her as ‘old McGonagall’.

• ‘Clearly fame isn’t everything’ – a sick burn from Snape there.

• In fact, his whole speech is perfect. Alan Rickman has so much presence.

• Flying lessons!

• Are you really best friends if you don’t laugh when they get hit in the face by a broomstick?

• Poor Neville – things just never seem to go his way.

• Harry being a natural on a broomstick is extremely impressive but did you see that roll from Malfoy? That boy also has talent.

• Would love to know why Quirrell had an iguana is his Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson – is it cursed?

• Hermione knowing more about Harry’s family history than Harry is so Hermione.

• Oh dear, they’re on the floor that guarantees a painful death – not ideal.

• Screaming is the correct reaction to seeing a massive, three-headed dog in our opinion.

• ‘I’m going to bed before either of you come up with another clever idea to get us killed, or worse, expelled’. Iconic.

• ‘She needs to sort out her priorities’ – also iconic.

• Does anyone else remember how everyone seemed to have crush on Oliver Wood as a teenager?

• ‘It’s Levi-o-sa not Levi-o-sa’ – you tell them Hermione.

• She’s not known as the cleverest-witch-of her-age for nothing.

• Oof Ron, that was just mean.

• Hallowe’en! You know that means…

• ‘Troll in the dungeon!’ An absolute classic.

• You mocked her before Ron, but now you’re more than happy for Hermione’s help with the Levitation Charm.

• Also, sticking your wand up the troll’s nose rather than casting a spell is quite the choice from Harry.

• To be fair, taking on a fully-grown mountain troll is quite the bonding experience.

• Why does Snape wishing Harry luck before his first Quidditch match sound like he’s wishing him the exact opposite?

• Wood could work on his pep talks.

• Here we go! Gryffindor vs. Slytherin!

• ‘I want a nice, clean game’… that feels unlikely.

• Something’s wrong with Harry’s broomstick! Extremely impressive that he manages to stay on it.

• Can we take a moment to talk about Hermione’s ruthless streak? Her friend is in danger, so she sets her teacher’s cloak on fire? Stone cold.

• Yay! Harry’s broom has sorted itself out.

• Well, swallowing the Snitch is certainly a novel way to catch it.

• With a ‘shouldn’ta said that’ from Hagrid, Nicolas Flamel has now entered the chat and we’re one step closer to unravelling the mystery beneath the trapdoor.

• IT’SSSS CHHHRRIIISTTMMASSS!

• Ron telling Harry he also has a Weasley jumper is so precious! He’s officially one of the family now.

• An Invisibility Cloak is possibly the coolest Christmas present.

• Extremely handy for all that out-of-hours roaming too.

• Doesn’t seem like Snape and Quirrell are the best of friends.

• The Mirror of Erised! We’ve always wondered what we would see… probably an endless supply of chocolate.

• Harry seeing his parents is far more wholesome – yet heartbreaking.

• ‘It does not do to dwell on dreams, Harry, and forget to live’… wise advice from Dumbledore.

• This book is considered ‘light reading’ by Hermione?! What on earth would she call a deep dive?

• Naturally Hermione is the one to figure out that Fluffy is guarding the Philosopher’s Stone – what would Harry do without her?

• We wouldn’t call raising a fire-breathing dragon in a wooden hut a great idea.

• However, baby Norbert is adorable.

• Looks like being a snitch has backfired – hasn’t it Malfoy?

• Sending a bunch of eleven-year-olds into the Forbidden Forest for detention hardly screams ‘health and safety is a priority at Hogwarts’.

• Especially when looking for a unicorn killer.

• Malfoy running away is pure comedy gold.

• Firenze always was known to be the friendliest of the centaurs.

• Yes! With Dumbledore around you’ll definitely be safe.

• So obviously within five minutes we learn he’s gone away.

• Through the trapdoor it is!

• We’re so proud of Neville standing up for his house – atrocious timing aside.

• ‘Brilliant-but-scary’ is a perfect description for Hermione.

• Poor Ron! From Fang to Fluffy, he’s always getting drooled on!

• To be fair we’d panic too if the only reassurance you can offer when trapped in Devil’s Snare is that you won’t be killed as quickly if you relax!

• It helps to be the youngest Seeker in a century when you have to find one flying key among many.

• Wizard chess! This is Ron’s moment to shine! You be that knight!

• The queen is a thing of nightmares.

• Ron’s sacrifice proves he truly is a Gryffindor – ‘Not me. Not Hermione. You!’

• ‘Me? Books and cleverness. There are more important things: friendship and bravery’. This film is full of the best lines.

• Quirrell reveal!

• Kudos to Ian Hart – his performance was truly haunting.

• Sharing your head with The Dark Lord himself would feel extremely claustrophobic.

• Having eyes in the back of your head could be useful though.

• As deaths go, Quirrell’s was particularly horrifying.

• ‘What happened down in the dungeons between you and Professor Quirrell is a complete secret, so, naturally, the whole school knows’ – even magical schools love a good gossip!

• ‘Alas, earwax!’ In our opinion, that’s possibly the best line of the entire film.

• We’re so pleased that Neville’s bravery was recognised – he totally deserved those 10 house points!

• ‘A change of decoration is in order!’ The Slytherins are fuming.

• Did you know that this final scene was the first scene they filmed? If you look closely, you’ll see Emma Watson has fake front teeth to recreate Hermione’s buck teeth… that costume decision didn’t last.

• What a first year at Hogwarts!

• Don’t mind us, we’ve just got something in our eye. We’re not emotional at that last shot of Hogwarts… not at all.

There you have it! If you’ve made it this far, we take our hats off to you. Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re off for another rewatch.